1 The Proposal BV $34,114,000 2 The HangoverWB $26,855,000 3 Up BV $21,336,000 4 Year OneSony $20,200,000 5 The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 Sony $11,300,000 6 Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian Fox $7,300,000 7 Star Trek Par. $4,700,000 8 Land of the Lost Uni. $3,976,000 9 Imagine That Par. $3,100,000 10 Terminator Salvation WB $3,070,000
That's right, people. There's nothing to worry about when your country's powerful investigative branch is devoting all of its resources and manpower to keeping American citizens from seeing blowjobs.
Just recently, the Associated Press was given nearly five hundred pages of redacted FBI files documenting the bureau's frantic attempt to put a stop to the moral decay threatening to rot the foundation right out from underneath this great nation. Of course, that argument seems a little paranoid when it is a reference to Communism, or the "Red Scare." It sounds even sillier when its about skin flicks.
No stone was left unturned by this mighty organization. Interviews (Linda Lovelace's interview appears to be redacted in its entirety), background checks, and even several synopses of the film as reported by agents who were apparently sent to watch the film and report on its contents. I'm guessing that several viewings were necessary in order to get all of the facts straight. One document even suggests that director Gerard Damiano might have been eligible for immunity from prosecution, which begs the question of what exactly he was willing to offer them in exchange. You would think mob intel would be the obvious choice, but there seems to be no mentions among any of the documents of the Mafia, or even investigations into possible links between the Mafia and the film. Which is odd, if you consider that Mafia ties were always near the top of the list with Deep Throat opponents.
Maybe somewhere in these reams of documents there is an explanation as to exactly why the FBI was so afraid of New York City grindhouses showing such felonious features of fictional fellatio fiends to friendly film fans. Maybe it was the final attempt of a government still predominantly run by aging white men who were considered ultra-conservative even back in the 1950's, before the freak flags started battling it out with Old Glory.
Of course, why the FBI got so interested in Deep Throat isn't really the issue. The issue is that the government, throughout the history of cinema, has always recognized the power of the flickering image, and has always sought to control it or suppress it in one form or another. Whether it is open and flagrant like the Hayes Code and Red Scare Blacklistings, or more covert and manipulative like this present example, the government has always wanted in on the action, one way or another.
A lot of the reports on these documents find amusement in remarking on how odd and obsolete an investigation such as this looks from the distance of decades. What almost none of them are going to ask is, if this was the kind of thing that secretive branches of the United States government were willing to persue, can you imagine what they must be up to now?
1 The Hangover WB $33,415,000 2 Up BV $30,515,000 3 The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3 Sony $25,000,000 4 Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian Fox $9,600,000 5 Land of the Lost Uni. $9,153,000 6 Imagine That Par. $5,700,000 7 Star Trek Par. $5,600,000 8 Terminator Salvation WB $4,695,000 9 Angels & Demons Sony $4,200,000 10 Drag Me to Hell Uni. $3,864,000
I hate to come right out and say "I told you so," but no one in the offices of This Movie Sucks! were ever convinced that David Carradine had committed suicide. We implied as much in our initial post reporting the actor's death.
Granted, when we first heard simply that he was found hanged, it was just a gut reaction. It would be like hearing that James Woods was caught taking ballet lessons. Some things are just too inconceivable to comprehend. The contradictory reports coming from Singapore, with police saying 'suicide' and managers saying 'natural causes', it was obvious that something weird was going on. Then, the phrase "found hanging in closet" hit the news cycle, and our minds were made up. No of David Carradine's stature hangs himself in a hotel room closet. That's just plain nonsense.
Well, the official word is out, and forensics expert Dr. Michael Baden has declared that, unless contradictory evidence is supplied with materials requested from Singapore, David Carradine's death was in no way a suicide.
So, now that the cat is out of the bag, I think there is an important question that must be asked here and now.
Exactly where was Chuck Norris at the time of David Carradine's death?
Granted, it is just speculation that Mr. Norris was responsible for the mysterious death of Bruce Lee, and there is no real evidence to connect him to the accidental death of Lee's son, Brandon. But now that yet another Martial Arts practicing actor with ties to Chuck Norris has met with a sudden and unexplained demise, I think it is time that we start keeping an eye on old Chuck.
I stumbled upon this the other day, and this could quite possible change the face of Bad Movie Night for us cinema trash freaks over here at This Movie Sucks! Just imagine pulling into any parking lot with a big blank wall and firing up Treasure of the Four Crowns for anyone who cars to pull over and watch. I get a tear in my eye just thinking about it.
Just imagine your typically urban highway, cutting through a sea of strip malls and mega-stores. Cars passing on the way to or from somwhere else, dusk settling over the landscape. Suddenly, one of the car's passengers notices something flashing across the side wall of a vacant Circuit City. The driver slows down long enough to recognize an old Italian zombie film being projected against the building's dingy white wall. Curious, the car pulls into the lot, where half a dozen people are enjoying the show. The newly arrived audience members are instructed on which channel to tune their radio into, and they settle in for the rest of the first half of that night's double feature, Demons 2 and Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things.
You see? Bad movies may rot the brain and bruise the soul, but they can still bring people together. I'm sorry, I have to stop. If I keep going, I'm going to start crying again...
The set-up seems fairly simple, with the only major cost being that of a decent projector. We'll keep you guys posted, but I am already looking into the possibility of converting my 2000 VW Jetta into a traveling Bad Movie Drive-In. Maybe we can even get the Phillipsburg/Easton area on the MobMov region map.
As a wise philosopher might have said if plied with enough cheap liqueur, "If we can't bring the people to the bad movies, than we shall bring the bad movies to the people!"
When I was a kid, I was a video junkie. I would always go to my local video store, called Palmer Video, in my then hometown of Belleville, NJ. This store was a bad movie fan's dream! They had everything. Even though Palmer Video was a commercial chain, it was still a mom-and-pop-shop operation, in every sense of the term. I guess everything was like that back then. They had one wall dedicated to just all new releases, and only one copy was ever available for everything, always. The first time I ever heard the word "reservation" was at a video store. I remember waiting days (and often weeks) to get my hands on a movie we had on "reserve."
They also had what I still consider, even to this day, one of the BEST horror sections ever. It was blocked off so the little kiddies wouldn't have nightmares from looking at the wonderfully grousome boxes. I would always wander in there before I went anywhere else. I still vividly remember browsing over titles like Make Them Die Slowly, Eaten Alive andCannibal Holocaust in these HUGE porno sized VHS boxes. The boxes would proudly scream warnings like "RATED X FOR GRAPHIC VIOLENCE," and "BANNED IN 31 Countries!!!" They also had saloon doors sectioning off the ADULT area that you could easily see around, especially if you were an 8 year old boy just hoping to get a glimpse of "the good stuff". I even remember the animatronic props they would display for films, such as a cleaver chopped down on the wrist of a hand while the fingers were still moving for Motel Hell. Surely we could never display something like that today, "Mothers Against" groups would never allow it.
This brings me to this little Italian film called The Warrior and the Sorceress. One day I walked into my local Palmer Video only to see this HUGE stand up cardboard cutout of the picture you see above. I HAD TO SEE THIS MOVIE! Look how cool that poster is! I grew up in the 80's, when wizards and warriors ruled the bad movie scene. They pumped out these types of flicks like Octomom pumps out kids. This movie had it all; overdubbed acting, sorceress enhanced swords that can slice through stone, and even a four-breasted dancer! Beat that Total Recall! (and 6 years earlier i might add.)
To this day, I still own this movie on VHS. I don't even own a VCR anymore, but I still own this movie. Every once in a while I get nostalgic and want to watch it, but then I sulk as I remember that I can't. It did receive the DVD treatment in 2002, but I missed the boat, and it is now discontinued. As much as I loved this film when I was a kid, I refuse to pay for a bootleg VHS to DVD copy, or buy the DVD from some schmuck who thinks his copy is worth $44 before shipping at Amazon.
I will, however, keep an eye out for it. On this note, I leave you with a few snippets of what is one of my earliest and fondest memories of David Carradine, 1984's The Warrior and The Sorceress! Enjoy these small but cool moments as I have over the years. Unfortunately, I could only find one English speaking clip, but that shouldn't stop you from enjoying Carradine's performance.
Reports are still coming in mixed: original reports have him found hanging in his hotel room by a maid Thursday morning after not showing up for dinner with his fellow actors the night before. Official spokespersons for Carradine, however, have gone on record originally as believing it was natural causes, and later holding back any details out of respect for the family. Of course, this kind of behavior is perfectly understandable for friends and associates of Carradine, who no doubt would like to avoid a media circus surrounded the tragic death of such an esteemed colleague.
David Carridine is a personal favorite of the crew here at TMS!, and we will no doubt post an update this weekend, along with a look at our movie rememberances of an iconic actor and screen legend.
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When I was a kid, I was a video junkie. I would always go to my local video store, called Palmer Video, in my then hometown of Belleville, NJ. This store was a bad movie fan's dream! They had everything. Even though Palmer Video was a commercial chain, it was still a mom-and-pop-shop operation, in every sense of the term. I guess everything was like that back then. They had one wall dedicated to just all new releases, and only one copy was ever available for everything, always. The first time I ever heard the word "reservation" was at a video store. I remember waiting days (and often weeks) to get my hands on a movie we had on "reserve." 
To this day, I still own this movie on VHS. I don't even own a VCR anymore, but I still own this movie. Every once in a while I get nostalgic and want to watch it, but then I sulk as I remember that I can't. It did receive the DVD treatment in 2002, but I missed the boat, and it is now discontinued. As much as I loved this film when I was a kid, I refuse to pay for a bootleg VHS to DVD copy, or buy the DVD from some schmuck who thinks his copy is worth $44 before shipping at Amazon.
Image via Wikipedia
